loss.

knowing that he's no longer going to be there when i come home,
knowing he's no longer going to run to me to hide when it rains,
knowing he'll not be protecting the home and its members,
knowing he'll not be pawing to enter the room when it's girltalk time,
knowing that he won't be there for me to hug when i feel like one,
knowing i won't be able to scold him for messing up the house,
knowing i wasn't there at the last few minutes of his life
makes this lump in my throat swell.

i could dwell on the many if-onlys,
i could wish i'd given him a better life,
but i choose to remember the blessing he's been,
the joy he's brought the family (and so many),
the lesson on forgiveness this little guy's taught me.

goodbye Skippi, i love you.