CRIMINAL RECORDS DEPARTMENT
Date: 09/08/07
Time: 22:33
- City: Singapore
- Occurred after: 16:30:00 07/08/2007
- Occurred before: 17:00:00 07/08/2007
- When reported: 22:41:32 08/08/2007
- Date disposition declared: 09/08/2007
- Incident number: 070000012 [first criminal *]
report this year. wait- first criminal report ever!
- Incident nature: Non-Criminal Death
- Incident address: Somewhere in the West
[uh, actually, it took place in thehomeoffice
where i now type this report.]
- Contact or caller: http://www.stoicallife.blogspot.com/
- Responsible officer: ME.
- Disposition: Closed Case
- Involvements:
Record#001 07/07/07 Mr Adventurous Lizard [Deceased]
Record#002 07/07/07 Ms Mother [Subject]
Record#003 08/07/07 Ms Sister1 [Subject]
Record#004 09/07/07 Ms Sister2 [Subject]
Record#005 08/07/07 Officer ME [Initiated Action]
- CaseType: Accidental Suicide, Second Degree Murder
[that means it was unintentional, non-premeditated.]
- Description:
the body of Mr Lizard was discovered by
Officer ME at 22:41:32 on 08/08/2007 by chance.
it was believed, and has been confirmed
that his death is connected to previously
reported case of the power trip in the homeoffice.
- Sequence of events:
Ms Mother was known to be toasting
a waffle with for tea when the trip occurred.
Officer ME was present and fixed the trip,
then the toaster worked normally again.
Officer ME reported to Ms Sister1 the findings
of what seemed to be a tail peeking out
from under the toaster at 22:41:32 08/08/2007.
Ms Sister1 gave orders to inform Ms Mother
of the discovery the soonest possible which would
be the next day.
Unknown to Officer ME, Ms Sister1 tugged at
the body part and it fell off.
Ms Sister1 is believed to have immediately
disposed the deceased's tail.
Before Officer ME reported to Ms Mother the
findings, Officer ME noticed the body part gone.
Officer ME sought the help of Ms Mother and
Ms Sister2 for advice to solve the case.
Ms Mother and Ms Sister2 provided Officer ME
a torchlight and a pair of chopsticks to extract
the rest of the deceased, Mr Lizard.
60% of his body suffered 3o burns,
remaining 40% were badly fried as well. **
The deceased's dislodged tail was already
in the chute.
Case possibly suicide.
- Evidence:
the dropping of the deceased was
discovered when the body was extracted
from the incriminating object.
specialists have concluded that the dropping
was only excreted after deceased experienced
electric shock that tripped the power in the homeoffice.
no signs of depression or death note to indicate
intention of killing himself.
- Verdict: Accidental Suicide.
--
* haha, i just realised i should've done up
a report like this regarding my poor maligned Skippi. :P
** sorry, no photos. it was already disgusting enough
having to pry it out from the vent of the toaster with
nothing more than a pair of disposable [*whew*] chopsticks!
